Results

After a long weekend of pretending everything was okay and trying to be brave for my kids I received a call from my primary care doctor the following Wednesday. My results were concerning, I needed a surgeon immediately and an oncologists. Talk about the wind being knocked out of me. Here I was home with my kids, up in my bedroom and a doctor just told me without actually telling me I have cancer. That day was a haze. I couldn't think, I couldn't feel, I could barely process what I was just told. What?! I'm sick! Very sick! This is not happening! I had to call David at work and tell him my results were not good. Do you know how hard it is to tell your husband that you have cancer? The person who you have created a life with, your best friend, the father of your children, your world... you are sick...you have that worst case scenario. You have the thing you have been denying and kept saying it's going to be fine. It's the worst thing I have had to do except telling my children. After telling him I had to continue my day, go to the soccer field, shield my kids for as long as I could.

The next day I had my appointment with the surgeon. Unfortunately David had to work but my life long friend Meg came with me. My surgeon got the lucky task of telling me I have breast cancer. There it is! The most common, treatable and curable form of breast cancer. I would have a lumpectomy and receive radiation and I would be fine. Very clean cut..bad news but not the worst of the worst. We would schedule the surgery for Monday the 19th and the mean time I would need blood work and an MRI to get a closer look at my left breast and a better measurement of things on my right. The best way to describe how I feel is overwhelmed! I just received life changing news. So much information to digest. I can't make a decision, I can't answer questions. I am frozen in this awful nightmare. My kids!! I have to tell my kids.

That weekend we sat the kids down and told them the news. They took it better then I thought. We put as positive of a spin on it as we could. They would be fine. I would be fine. It won't be easy but we'll make it through. My kids are amazingly strong. I love them with all my heart! I will do this for my family! I will survive for my family!